On the Loss of a Child

lossFrom one mother to another

 Dear friend,

On knowing that you have lost your baby, I can truly say that I am aware of exactly how you feel. Having been through the same kind of loss more than once, I would be lying if I said that the pain will go away soon. I would be cheating on myself if I expect you to not worry as things like this happen. Losing my angels, Ayden and Aniella, were the worst experiences in my life and they will live on with me to the end. There is not a single day that goes by without me thinking about them, I still sob my heart out often. But I truly thank God for giving them to me, even if it was for a short while. It was wonderful having them. They taught me the true meaning of the word ‘Mother’.

Since you have carried a baby in your womb, you are no longer the same person you were before. You became a mother the moment you conceived. It is okay for you to cry and grieve your loss. Don’t hold on to your feelings as the pain will only amplify, if you do so.


It is hard for both spouses to be in so much pain and not know how to help the other. Yes, your husband too is going through a lot of pain at the moment, even though he may not be expressing any of it. At present, to you, it may seem like having a baby didn’t really matter to him. The reality is that your baby did matter a lot to him, but you matter even more. Hence, he is holding fort and staying strong for you. It will be good if you understand his position and share with him, the pain that you both are experiencing.

I can truthfully say that I believe that God has planned our lives and he truly works miracles. It is only time that will unfold true happiness. I hold my little baby girl, tight in my arms, as I write this to you. She is my reason to believe that God knows what He is doing. As hard as it is to accept loss, I assure u that He is up there watching over you and holding you & your husband in His arms. He is whispering into your ears that He knows what is good. You need to listen to His faint voice. It is awfully hard but that is the only thing that will get u through your time of trial. I pray that you hear God’s voice and you feel peace. He will make all things good, in His time. Take care of yourself as His plan is about to unravel.

– Petronella Eates

(Photo Credit, David Niblack, Imagebase.net)




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